Archive for 'mumble'

Umm sir you have a drink in one hand and a bagel…

Posted on 22. Apr, 2011 by in mumble

Umm sir you have a drink in one hand and a bagel in the other. How exactly are you driving…and what’s your name?

is a scofflaw waiting to happen this morning.

Posted on 04. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

is a scofflaw waiting to happen this morning.

Who buys only one chicken wing?

Posted on 03. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

Who buys only one chicken wing?

got a water bottle full of whiskey in my handbag,…

Posted on 03. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

got a water bottle full of whiskey in my handbag, got my drunk text on I’ll regret it in the mornin…

the Russia House is very cool especially when you…

Posted on 03. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

the Russia House is very cool especially when you roll up with your Russian friends.

just had a little greek, a little turkey and a…

Posted on 03. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

just had a little greek, a little turkey and a little lebanese.

Not sure about 500 more, the 12 miles I walked…

Posted on 03. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

Not sure about 500 more, the 12 miles I walked today is pretty much enough for me.

Not sure about 500 more, the 12 miles I walked…

Posted on 03. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

Not sure about 500 more, the 12 miles I walked today is pretty much enough for me.

The security issue has been averted thank God.

Posted on 02. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

The security issue has been averted thank God.

who’s bright idea was it to get up this early? <a…

Posted on 02. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

who’s bright idea was it to get up this early?

is requesting a 5:00 am wake up call. Thank you.…

Posted on 02. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

is requesting a 5:00 am wake up call. Thank you.

either my dad’s had too much to drink tonigh or my…

Posted on 02. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

either my dad’s had too much to drink tonigh or my great-grandfather really was involved in the illegal production of alcohol in Passaic during the Depression.

I’m so excited. I just signed up for the word of…

Posted on 01. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

I’m so excited. I just signed up for the word of the day e-mail from urbandictionary.com. According to Wikipedia about 80% of the people who visit the site are under the age of 25. Keeping up with all the new slang terms should really help my steeze, especially with the kids these days.

OMG. I can’t take it anymore, you picked him, not…

Posted on 01. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

OMG. I can’t take it anymore, you picked him, not me!!

Is it a bad sign if a plant is dying in the…

Posted on 01. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

Is it a bad sign if a plant is dying in the waiting room of a doctor’s office?

and does he know your talking to me, will it start…

Posted on 01. Oct, 2010 by in mumble

and does he know your talking to me, will it start a fight, no I don’t think she has a clue….

shorty hitting me up, says she wanna re-up, knows…

Posted on 30. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

shorty hitting me up, says she wanna re-up, knows I got the best in town.

I’d like to meet the people who work at…

Posted on 30. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

I’d like to meet the people who work at urbandictionary.com. Are they all 20 something guys who never matured much past 16. I mean “dog in a bathtub”, who’s making this stuff up?

Flood watch, tornado watch, hail?? Seriously? I’m…

Posted on 30. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

Flood watch, tornado watch, hail?? Seriously? I’m really thinking of skipping work and doing all those fun things I have planned for when the world is about to come to an end.

Boardwalk Empire is such a great show. And Michael…

Posted on 30. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

Boardwalk Empire is such a great show. And Michael Pitt, you are so stinking cute. Ohh Michael.

numb lips aren’t as much fun as you might think.…

Posted on 30. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

numb lips aren’t as much fun as you might think.

Oh God the fat lip is starting already. <a…

Posted on 29. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

Oh God the fat lip is starting already.

I’m pretty certain that the copy sales”kid” that…

Posted on 29. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

I’m pretty certain that the copy sales”kid” that just came in the office smelled like pot.

is wondering what to wear to a police chiefs’ wine…

Posted on 29. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

is wondering what to wear to a police chiefs’ wine and cigar night.

is doin it and doin it and doin it well…… <a…

Posted on 29. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

is doin it and doin it and doin it well……

I would make a horrible hostage negotiator. It…

Posted on 28. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

I would make a horrible hostage negotiator. It took me almost 20 minutes to convince the 4 year old to go inside the doctor’s office. Someone would have surely been dead under different circumstances.

I can’t believe the guy in the lobby actually said…

Posted on 28. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

I can’t believe the guy in the lobby actually said to me, “nice weather out today” He was totally serious. I said, “Umm really? It’s like overcast and humid, plus there is a tornado watch. But hey, maybe that’s your thing.”

I hate fundraisers. I know the money benefits the…

Posted on 28. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

I hate fundraisers. I know the money benefits the kids but I would prefer to make a flat donation to the school and not have to harass my friends and family, many who have their own fundraisers to deal with. Hey who wants to buy some overpriced wrapping paper, can’t you use another candle, or maybe you want to buy some fattening cheesecakes? Can we please jsut stop it already?!

To the dad who insists on engaging the bus driver…

Posted on 28. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

To the dad who insists on engaging the bus driver in a full conversation every morning as the school bus is stopped with it’s lights on and the traffic is piling up in both directions. How about a little courtesy for those of us who need to get on our way? The world doesn’t stop for you. If what you have to say is so important get a number or friend him on FB, just stop taking up our time. Thank you.

Now that’s an unfortunate place to get nicked with…

Posted on 28. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

Now that’s an unfortunate place to get nicked with a razor.

Ugh, my bad luck streak seem to be never ending.…

Posted on 27. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

Ugh, my bad luck streak seem to be never ending. The lastest was getting on the elevator with the old guy who smelled like moth balls. (Please don’t ask me how I know what moth balls smell like. Thank you.)

OMG can we all agree not to talk about Lindsay…

Posted on 27. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

OMG can we all agree not to talk about Lindsay Lohan? You have no idea how close I am to stabbing myself in the eye, just so I don’t have to read about it anymore. Clearly there must be something more interesting on Perez Hilton to talk about. I’ll let you know if I find something.

does not feel right. <a rel="nofollow"…

Posted on 27. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

does not feel right.

hey you know what sucks? Oh forget it, you…

Posted on 27. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

hey you know what sucks? Oh forget it, you probably already know.

I told you when you asked, I knew this wouldn’t…

Posted on 27. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

I told you when you asked, I knew this wouldn’t last…

I think I lost my FB mojo. Hopefully I just left…

Posted on 27. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

I think I lost my FB mojo. Hopefully I just left it some place and I’ll find it soon. Maybe it’s next to my car keys.

I’m making pretzels, brownies and chili. And I’m…

Posted on 26. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

I’m making pretzels, brownies and chili. And I’m not even hungry.

is glad to see that some “problems” resolve…

Posted on 26. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

is glad to see that some “problems” resolve themselves without intervention. You just need to be patient.

When you tell me I’m a wreck, you say that I’m a…

Posted on 26. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

When you tell me I’m a wreck, you say that I’m a mess, how could you expect anything less?…..

finds it very ironic that I just got an e-mail…

Posted on 25. Sep, 2010 by in mumble

finds it very ironic that I just got an e-mail about an alleged hip replacement recall.